Open Wounds
by Ready Or Notxx
Summary: We all know about what happened in the bathroom. Adam killed Zep. But there's something we didn't know. Something Lawrence didn't know, and something Adam didn't want to admit. Adam and Zep were together once. AdamxLawrence/Mild AdamxZep. Oneshot.


Recently, I discovered that I liked ANOTHER new pairing. I used to hate this pairing, but now that I think about it… It's so cute. XD Even if it could be abusive (which is how I imagine it). Includes: AdamxLawrence/Mild AdamxZep. Inspiration: Day-dreaming in math. Enjoy, darlings. This is what trying to find the lateral surface area of a cylinder creates.

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**Open Wounds**

Adam Faulkner had been marking the days on his calendar since then. First… one. Next, fifteen. Then, one hundred. The days have gone by so quickly that Adam's surprised he's even able to count them, but not a day has gone by where Adam's forgotten to count it. It just happens. It'll always happen.

The abuse. The hand-prints that marred Adam's face and his daughter's face with simple _whap-whap-whap _sounds. The constant _fuck you _that Adam hissed out in a spray of spit, tears streaming down his cheeks in attempts to shield himself. Failed attempted, failed, failed, failed attempts.

The leaving.

The gap.

The bathroom.

Three hundred sixty. Three hundred sixty-one.

Now there's Lawrence. Thank God. Adam needs Lawrence, needs the comfort and love and affection and attention that he wasn't getting before. The knowledge that Lawrence won't leave him, no matter what, is what keeps him happy and keeps him from striking razors across his wrists.

Three hundred sixty-two.

It's not hard to be with him. Adam's in love with the idea of Lawrence coming home from work so they can kiss or make love or even sit together on the couch. And Adam wouldn't change the life he has now for the life he had before. He'd never go back.

Three hundred sixty-three.

Scars. Lawrence always asks about the scars on Adam's body, but Adam always puts a cigarette to his pink lips and shrugs. Like he doesn't know, doesn't know how scars got on his own fucking body, scars, scars that show in all the places they shouldn't.

Three hundred sixty-four.

Three hundred sixty-five.

Adam stares at the ceiling, his gray eyes wide open, the other side of the bed unmade next to him, next to him where Lawrence's warm, naked body once was.

Now that appropriately dressed doctor stands in the bathroom, parting his hair like a Lawrence Gordon truly would. He smiles at Adam from the mirror, but Adam just blinks back at him numbly. Like he doesn't have much to say anymore.

Not today.

Because it's been a year since… _then._

"You all right?" asks Lawrence, now in the doorway, his blue gaze resting upon Adam as he turns off the bathroom light. Adam just nods slowly, so Lawrence purses his lips in a puzzled sort of way.

He doesn't get it. He shouldn't be subjected to such shit.

But here it goes. The feelings, all the emotional discharge shit that Adam's been bottling up for a year is coming back again, rising up through his chest. They form sobs, and sobs are something that Adam simply won't stand for, not today, not now, not ever.

Lawrence makes his way to the bed and sits on the edge. The bed reacts by shaking when he sits down.

Adam doesn't look at him.

And Lawrence does notice that, notices it almost immediately. Because when Adam's upset, he'll usually look Lawrence in the eye, or break down crying, begging him not to go to work even though he has to, he simply has to. He has to or he'll be fired, and Adam should understand that.

Adam does understand that. But not enough to let it go.

Normally Adam would argue and bitch and scream at Lawrence, even though it's not Lawrence's fault, he just wants something to be angry at because he's upset and frustrated with himself.

But it's different today.

"Adam."

Lawrence's voice.

Stern.

"Mm."

That's it. The only sound Adam breathes out, doesn't even open his mouth to make it. Doesn't bother. It'll just become a trail of wasted breaths anyways, so why bother to open his mouth? What's the point of that?

"Adam. What's the matter with you."

Not a question. More like Lawrence is saying, "Tell me what's wrong _now."_

"Nothing's wrong."

Adam's voice.

Adam almost sees Lawrence _flinch _when he speaks, and he knows why. He doesn't sound like himself, like an angry man with eyes that glow like bright fire when he's infuriated, like a small man with a feminine, angry voice.

That's what he should sound like.

Not this… This empty, soulless voice that captures and buries his own.

This abyss.

You fall into it, it sucks you down, and you can't get out.

Like what happened before a year ago.

Except Adam got out.

He got out.

"You know how I was surprised about Zep being in your house with your wife and daughter?" asks Adam finally, blinking again. Lawrence's eyes widen, so Adam keeps going on before he can confirm his answer to the question. "Well. I knew him. Before I was asked to take pictures of you. I knew him pretty well, too."

Lawrence's lips are practically glued together as Adam continues. His eyes don't even tell Adam anything. They just stare.

"Um… I was in a relationship with him. And... He was nice to me at first. I thought we were… fucking soul-mates."

Adam shudders.

"Then… The longer I stayed with him… The more he put me down. Insulted me. Told me he would leave me as soon as he got the chance, but he didn't…"

Adam's words.

They're moving so fast now.

"It would've been too fucking easy for him to have left me. He wanted someone to torture, so that's why he lured me in. He needed to make me feel small in order to feel good about his self. So he hit me. Cut me up."

"_You fucking bastard…" Adam spat before Zep grabbed his face and took another swing at it. Sent black spots flying through his head. Sent blood down his face, and Adam just laid on the carpet, barely moving. You don't move when you're Zep's prey. You don't get to._

_Zep grinned. "What are you doing to do about it?" He reached down and forced Adam to look at him, into his cold, cruel, dark, miserable eyes. "Run? If you run from me, I'll find you. I'll always find you. And I'll rip your mouth off if you scream."_

_Trembled. Adam trembled and bit into his lip, knowing that that was the only thing he could do to defend himself now. Just agree with him and let him do what he wants, and this'll all be over soon. That was Adam's way of thinking._

"I… ran away eventually," Adam goes on, sighing softly. "I was too afraid to do that constantly. I was too afraid he would find me. But one day… I just… I just got up and left, you know? I got tired of it, and when I found out he was part of the whole Jigsaw thing… I was scared."

"You killed him."

Lawrence finally speaks, and Adam sees him nod.

Adam feels himself nod as well.

"I got free. That's how I got fucking free, Lawrence."

He'd left Zep three hundred sixty-five days ago today. A year, a whole fucking year without his tormentor slapping him around or causing him serious mental harm.

Adam had killed Zep.

Now he's free.

Lawrence nods slowly again. "Thank you for telling me, Adam." The smile returns to his perfect face. Adam could melt. "I appreciate your honesty."

This perfect man is what Adam has now. He's a doctor, he's sweet, he's attractive, he's smart, and while he also has his faults, he treats Adam like he's the most important thing in the world.

Lawrence scoots next to Adam on the bed and lays his head down next to the small voyeur.

"I think I'll call in sick today."

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I tried my best. XD I hope you guys liked it. Review, please!


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